Welcome back to Life With Kevin! Itâ€™s been awhile since Iâ€™ve written an installment of Life With Kevin. Iâ€™ve covered many of the interesting elements of Life With Kevin: tea, tea bongs, CDs, the basement, bagels, and kombucha. I thought there wasnâ€™t anything left until…
I moved Kevinâ€™s car.
If you’ve ever tried to park in the KEXP parking lot after 10am, you know it can be quite a task. We have more people than we do parking spots, so we double, triple, and even quadruple park. This works well until the person who arrived early has to leave, at which time they wander around the station trying to figure out whose cars are blocking them.
Kevin was on the air when a staffer came into our office to let me know that Kevin’s car was blocking them. Kevin gave me his keys and I went outside to move his car.
Kevinâ€™s car… where do I start? First off, Kevin has no headlights. His headlights have been out for as long as I can remember. Last month I asked if heâ€™d gotten them fixed yet and he said no. I asked, “so when youâ€™re driving home at night donâ€™t people flash their lights at you to tell you that your headlights are off?” “Yes, they do,” said Kevin, “and itâ€™s pretty annoying.”
I thought this was the only unique quality to Kevinâ€™s car, but I was sorely mistaken â€“ the driverâ€™s door doesnâ€™t work. Like most people, I went to the driverâ€™s side to put the key in and open the door, but it didnâ€™t work. If you get into Kevinâ€™s car you have to open the passenger door and crawl across the front seat.
Next: Kevinâ€™s car is a stick shift. I didnâ€™t know this until I sat down, but luckily I can drive a stick thanks to the 1977 Mustang Ghia I drove from 1984-1988. Not everyone can though, which seriously limits the possibilities of people who can move Kevinâ€™s car. If itâ€™s blocking, find me or Sara, not one of KEXPâ€™s young, automatic-transmission bred employees.
Back to Kevinâ€™s car: itâ€™s as neat as a pin â€“ and itâ€™s a total disaster. Yes, thatâ€™s an oxymoron, but itâ€™s true. Itâ€™s the neatest, cleanest car Iâ€™ve ever seen, but the front seat console is filled with used tea bags, and in the backseat was a bowl of oatmeal, Odwalla wrappers, and empty green tea bottles. Apparently Kevin takes his oatmeal out to the car and eats it while he changes gears, drinks his tea and talks on his cell phone. All while having no headlights and a driverâ€™s door that doesnâ€™t work.
My advice is that if you live in West Seattle and see Kevin Cole rockinâ€™ down the road, watch out!