by Corbett Cummins and Heather Christianson
As the Sasquatch Festival approaches, there have been numerous alleged sightings of a creature with wild and unruly hair in the capitol hill area. After careful analysis of surveillance videos, biologists were able to identify the beast as Reggie Watts.
This amazing being is native to the Seattle area but has been known to migrate around the world. Recently though, scientists have been able to find evidence of him nesting in the New York City area. Easily identifiable by his unique hair pattern he also has an extremely distinctive call that utilizes his massive vocal range and digital tape loop device to create songs that are part funk, part soul and part comedy.
Reggie Watts dominating the Get Loweded Stage
Apparently the first sighting of this mysterious creature was at the Re-Bar, where he allegedly took the stage during the Get Loweded. According to anonymous reports, he nearly killed the entire audience with cerebral rants and beat boxing sound effects. Get Loweded host Jackson Lowe described the event as stunning.
“The capacity crowd in attendance was on their feet clapping when no one could remember exactly WHY,” said producer Chaz Roberts. He added that the occurrence “will definitely be one of the highlights of Get Loweded history.”
Reggie Watts was spotted again Wednesday night during a production of the comedy show Laff Hole in its new location: the Capitol Hill Arts Center where he exhibited similar behavior and left the audience hysterical, dumbfounded and hungry for more.
Laff Hole producer and amateur Wattsologist Kevin Hyder of the Peoples Republic of Komedy explain to Where the Funny Matters how Reggie Watts is such an enigma.
“Sightings of him are rare due to his busy touring schedule,” Said Hyder “but he appears to be drawn in by the smell of alternative comedy venues like PRoK and Get Loweded. Those who have witnessed his performances in this his most natural habitat report the experience to be breathtaking.”
Aziza Diaz studies the mythical Mane of Reggie Watts
With the help Hyder and other amateur Wattsologists, Where the Funny Matters was able to capture this precious footage of Reggie Watts in his natural habitat.
Reggie Watts praises Seattle’s Comedy and Condo Culture
Scientists believe that Reggie Watts is traveling the Gorge for as part of the annual Sasquatch Migration. They predict that he will be at the Comedy Tent on Sunday at 4:45.